“If you’re walking down the right path and you’re willing to keep walking, eventually you’ll make progress.”
Woke up tired & just not feeling it today. I had tennis class, but decided to skip it since I was afraid I didn’t have enough gas to get there & back, & the $2 I have left till Thursday would just not cut it if I got up there & couldn’t get back.
I just put $10 in it, but it seems to be using more gas than I’m used to, but I’m used to driving little economy cars & this is more of a cruiser, & of course the gas prices are back up over $3/gal so $10 ain’t what it used to be:~/ Well, I’ll know to budget more gas money for this month.
I went back to sleep later & was still sleeping when my dad came home. He wanted to know why I hadn’t gone to class since I been excited about it. Of course when I told him, he wanted to know why I hadn’t told him so he could have given me some money. Oh well. He was working today & I didn’t decide on it until after I got up.
But that’s why I decided not to live on my own anymore. I need somebody around to notice what’s going on with me, someone who actually gives a fuck. That last bit is why I didn’t work out with the “friend” I lived with previously. He only cared about how what I did impacted him, but that’s about as far as he cared about anyone. But I digress.
It’s nice to have someone around who notices when I’m excited about something, & is then concerned enough to check up on me when I don’t do it. Oh yeah, & doesn’t tell me to “just stop” feeling depressed or anxious, & doesn’t blame me for not wanting to hang out with them when half the things I say are ignored & they usually stop talking when I come in the room. But that’s my fault somehow. Oops, digressing again:~) Is my bitter showing? I was in a cranky, ranting mood yesterday, too.
I think I might be getting sick; maybe a sinus infection. I have been more tired lately, & today am just feeling off. Tired, head-achy, stomache has been feeling weird all day, kinda in knots, not really sick. I had this before with my stomach. It lasted for days, maybe a couple of weeks, until I went to the doctor & she gave me an antispasmodic. She never said what it was though, just gave me a prescription. I didn’t think to ask at the time. The pill made it stop that day though. I think it’s an IBS thing.
And sinus issues are old hat for me. I’m hoping when I have health insurance again I might be able to get something done about it. I had a bad infection that wouldn’t go away for months about three years ago. It started after my basement apartment flooded from the apartment above, & just got worse no matter what they did for it until I finally moved. I don’t think my sinuses have ever fully cleared, & my ears have certainly never stopped ringing.
Oh well, today is my youngest niece’s first birthday, so I’ve been trying to finish up a doll for her (it was supposed to be her xmas present…). So that has been my focus today. Not entirely a do-nothing day:~)
Oh, & I have eaten for shit today. But surely that can’t have anything to do with how bad I feel:~)