If you are a regular reader of this blog, you probably know the biggest part of my Bipolar Disorder is the Depressions. I have a lot of days where I can’t get out of bed or get motivated to care about anything including myself. This is part of the reason I consider myself a perpetual beginner at running because I have quit so often, going weeks or months without running, that I feel like I am constantly starting over. I’ve been doing much better this year. I have been committed to my running, therapy, taking my meds, & just generally taking better care of myself. All of that has combined to put me in a much better place, which has enabled me to do a much better job of all those things. It’s a cycle of goodness.
Reading this post, much of it rang true to me so naturally I wanted to share it here because I’m sure many of you have either struggled with Depression yourself or have someone close to you who has.
The four main points presented & the parts of them I most identified with are:
- Be on their side. “The person may have lost perspective on how big a problem this actually is. They will find it hard to hear that what is insurmountable for them is actually not such a big deal.” HUGE! No faster way to get me to shut you out than to make light of how I’m feeling.
- Give Plenty of reassurance. “Many people suffering with depression feel unworthy of being loved. ” If you live in this state long enough, even post-Depression it is hard to shake the feeling you don’t deserve to be loved.
- Give understanding & sympathy. “People with depression can spend a lot of time ruminating on their situation and feeling sorry for themselves. Pointing it out to them is not helpful.” Depression blots out anything good in your life, so pointing out some new way for them to be wrong is the opposite of helpful.
- Offer to help. “If you ask, ‘What is the best thing I can do to help you right now?’ don’t be offended if the reply is ‘Leave me alone’. Sometimes, that is the most helpful thing you can do at present.” <<THIS
And another snippet that rings true for me:
Well meaning people often attempt to fix the problem. They may say something like, “Have you tried aromatherapy? There was an article about it in the paper…” This kind of comment can come across as trivializing the illness.
(I am probably guilty of this last one since I’m feeling better. Much like a newly recovering addict, you think you have found the answer & you MUST SHARE IT with everyone because it is so awesome & will change their lives, too!)