My Year To Thrive

"My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style." ~Maya Angelou


Small Habits Make Big Changes

“What if someone told you to floss only one tooth everyday? Or start the new year, not with grand resolutions, but with a simple challenge?”
~BJ Fogg, “Forget Big Change, Start with a Tiny Habit”

Trigger Warning

Okay, this video was not just smart & insightful, it was entertaining. As I’m sure you gleaned from the title, Mr. Fogg advocates making small changes over time if you want to make a big change. He believes you are more likely to stick with a habit you can perform quickly & easily, than some lofty goal that can be onerous & discouraging. From there you build on those small changes until the big change sneaks up on you, already a habit. Continue reading



A Quick Update On Life

It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.
~C. S. Lewis (BrainyQuotes)

nail filing cat animated

Miss me?

A lot has been going on for me.  I’m trying to get back to blogging here regularly, so a quick update seems like a good starting point.

I moved in with the boyfriend.  It happened admittedly fast, but a friend asked me to get a place with her & he intervened before he lost me to other commitments.  It’ll be great once his roommate finds another place to live…

I started at the new MHC.  Unfortunately it is an hour from me now.  I was living in the middle of here & there, so it was fine.  Ironically, after I get in at a new MHC, I move to the town where the old one is.

On the subject of my old MHC, my doctor advised me to get their reason for dismissing me in writing, since I never did get any official notification of being removed from the program.  They say it was for missed appointments, but I’m pretty sure that’s bullshit.  I have all my receipts, & can prove I was there, but I have already moved on so it doesn’t matter.  They sucked anyway.  My new place is much better & I get one-on-one therapy instead of just some joke that passes for group therapy.

I haven’t been keeping up with the exercise.  I’ve “played” some tennis, gone for some walks, run a little, but nothing regular or serious.  I have been in the middle of moving & worrying about money, & have felt so unsettled.  It’s been hard to get too interested in working out.  It should be the opposite, but you know how it is.

Apparently I’m OCD.  I knew I had some traits, but never connected my obsessive worrying with the actual disorder.  I’m doing research into the issue, & will write more about it later.  The new psych NP increased my anxiety med &, at my request, upped my antidepressant.

Hope you guys are well!  See you soon 🙂


Happy Birthday To Me!

The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.
Oprah Winfrey (Brainy Quote)

Today is my birthday.  I had another post planned, but decided to go with something more appropriate to the occasion.

What did I accomplish in the last year of my life? Continue reading

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Weekly Update: Jan. 28 – Feb. 3, 2013

Since I didn’t finish the 10K week 2 last week, I repeated it this week.    I was still not feeling up to life on Monday, so I stayed in bed with my kitty & caught up on Tuesday.  That made Tuesday a very busy day!  Ended the week having ran two of my three days of the week, & did all three of the x-training/strength/stretching days.  I missed strength training, but I had a good day at tennis.  Hopefully this next week goes better.

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Weekly Update: Jan. 14-20

“If you can’t fly, then run.
If you can’t run, then walk.
If you can’t walk, then crawl.
But whatever you do, you have to keep moving forward.”
~Martin Luther King, Jr.

Finished week 1 of the Hal Higdon 10K novice program.  Hurray!  I did all the workouts, plus stretches, dynamic stretches, & core work in my strength training class on Wednesday.  I took Thursday off, so did my “long run” Sunday.

Continue reading


Weekly Update: Jan 7-13, 2013

I see exercise taking this perverted detour. The original intention of exercise was to heal and maintain health. Now I see it as having nothing to do with health. I see most exercises based on looking good. They actually make you less healthy. You overdevelop the obvious muscles. You take drugs to enhance that. You ignore the rest, and you become more out of balance.
~Bryan Kest 
(Quote Garden)

 Not going to break this week down because I’ve done a lot that wasn’t tracked anywhere.

I started my strength training & tennis classes this week..  The ST class was folded in with other classes that didn’t have enough students left after the drop period to be their own class, so it will be more general that just lifting.  She is going give me a personalized lifting regimen though & said I could just lift if that’s all I wanted to do.  I’m down for mixing it up though.  Tennis was just a “hey, how ya doing” class this week, so nothing to report there.  I have already informed a friend that she is going to be my tennis partner & I will teach her how to be a shitty tennis player just like me!

Said friend & I also joined a gym this week.  I went a few days.  Since it’s January it’s been extra busy this week, but I did the bike, a fusion class, & some treadmill intervals.  That was fun.  We have our consult with the trainer Tuesday & we’ll see what comes of that.  I have already told her I will not weigh or have my body fat percentage taken, & I don’t need to know what my BMI is.  She looked at me like I had two heads.  I want to focus on what I can do & how I feel.  What I weigh is irrelevant. Continue reading


Finding The Words For My Feelings

The strong man is the one who is able to intercept at will the communication between the senses and the mind.
~Napoleon Bonaparte (Brainy Quotes)

A fluffy gray kitten lying on a pillow & snuggled under a towel sleeping.

What I usually look like after my feelings have been hurt.

I had something amazing happen the other day.  I read a comment made on a picture I posted to tumblr that was a bit negative, but more about the preference of the person commenting than I think directed at me.  It flew all over me, tied my stomach in knots, & turned what had been a good productive day into just wanting to crawl under the covers & give up.

After sitting on these feelings for a bit I messaged a friend of mine.

ugh i hate those anxious moods where every piddly thing feels like a personal attack on me. ruins my whole day because someone says something totally stupid.

…you know how those days are when every.fucking.thing. feels intensely personal & you take everything the worst possible way.

so i was going along having a good day & then WHAM! i just wanted to crawl under the covers & give up for today.

When I posted it I realized I have had these feelings for years & never been able to tell anyone how I was feeling.  It was just trapped eating away inside me, ruining so many days over stupid shit.  Hurray for emotional growth!

So here was my last message about it:

at least it’s good to be able to put what i’m feeling into words instead of letting it eat me alive because i don’t even know how to tell anyone what is going on.

Being able to tell someone how you are feeling is like an exorcism; not being able to talk about how you are feeling is like having that demon gnawing away at your soul with no relief.  I am really proud of all the work I have put into myself & the progress I have made.  I just wish I hadn’t been kicked out of the MHC.  I still haven’t found out why – no call as promised & no letter.  Thank goodness I had a refill left on my meds so I didn’t have to go into crisis mode.